The Eulogy That Forgot the Deceased

Alec Baldwin managed to name almost everyone he'd ever worked with - except the man he was supposed to be honouring

Alec Baldwin has delivered what may be the most unintentionally hilarious celebrity tribute in modern history.

You’d assume that if you’re recording a video tribute for the recently deceased Australian actor Sam Neill, that the video would be about … Sam Neill.

But you’d be wrong.

Sam Neill gets about ten seconds.

The rest of the almost three-minute Alec Baldwin tribue to Sam Neill is about … Alec Baldwin.

It begins well enough …

I just wanted to come on here quickly and say how stricken I was to learn of the death of Sam Neill

But after that opening, Sam Neill disappears faster than free champagne at a Hollywood after-party.

Because Baldwin suddenly remembers someone far more interesting.

Himself …

“When I did the Hunt for Red October it was shot in 89 it came out in in 1990 a long time ago and that was probably my first big movie in terms of having a decent sized role.

“Cause I’d done Working Girl and Bettle Juice and things like that where I’d had a smaller role.”

It’s an astonishing pivot.

But Baldwin was only just getting started.

And I did Hunt for Red October and um, yes, John was a great director and one of the most exciting parts of it for me was to meet Tom Clancey.

Then Baldwin starts listing famous people.

Not because they knew Sam. But because they knew Alec.

Infact, he pretty much empties the entire contents of his contacts list.

“But the cast, I mean I’ll never, I’ve worked with great people tony and Meryl and so many other people that I really admired.

“I mean obviously Sean, Larry Ferguson, Scott Glenn, Tim Curry, James Earl Jones, Peter Firth, Richard Jordan, Jos Auckland, Courtney Vance, jenny Davis, Fred Thompson, Jeffrey Jones, Ron Guttman, Stellan Skarsgård … and that’s just the more recognisable names.

“There’s a lot of other people there who I enjoyed working with.”

That’s not a tribute.

That’s the closing credits.

At this point Sam Neill is less the subject of the video than the occasion that allowed Alec Baldwin to remind everyone he’d once shared oxygen with famous people.

Hollywood narcissism has always been remarkable. But Baldwin achieved something rare with his Sam Neill tribute video.

He has made grief sound like networking.

And then came my favourite part. Because Baldwin becomes emotional.

Not about Sam Neill. But about what an incredible experience it was ... being Alec Baldwin.

“My God, my God, um, what an experience that was.

“What an experice it was to do that movie with those people.

“Every time you turned around to do a scene you were with this great actor.”

This isn’t a eulogy anymore.

And now we’re deep into scene analysis …

“Ron Guttman’s a perfect example … he’s smoking this cigarette … and he’s like …

Then he’s doing impersonations …

“‘I told you to speak your mind but my God jag.’ James Earl Jones.”

And then he’s back to remembering the favourite scenes from his own movies …

“Richard Jordan and that scene in the conference room.

“Courtney Vance calling them seaman boatman. I mean that’s one of the few movies I’ve ever done where I remember the whole movie.”

By now we’re almost three minutes in to the Sam Neill tribute.

We’ve heard about Baldwin’s career.

Baldwin’s breakthrough role.

Baldwin’s famous director.

Baldwin’s meeting with Tom Clancy.

Baldwin’s work with with Meryl, and Sean Connery, and James Earl Jones, and just about everybody except the man the tribute was supposedly about.

Then, right at the end, it’s almost as though someone behind the camera whispers...

“Psst... Alec... Sam Neill.”

And suddenly he remembers.

“Anyway, oh my God, my God Sam Neill!

“My love to his family.

“My love to his family.”

Now, to be fair, that part was gracious.

But it also means Sam Neill - the reason for the video - received less screen time than Baldwin’s recollection of meeting Tom Clancy.

Sam Neill spent a lifetime making audiences forget he was acting.

Alec Baldwin has somehow managed to make a tribute forget who it was he was grieving.

And perhaps that’s the perfect metaphor for modern celebrity.

For some people, every event is autobiographical. Even someone else’s obituary is just another chapter in the story of me.