"Using a press conference on domestic violence to shamelessly virtue signal is not just pathetic" - it’s downright insulting and degrading.
Warning: Rant ahead. Forgive me for launching into this, but I’ve been thinking about it for a long time, and here’s my opportunity to put thought into words.
What will $4.7 billion actually achieve?
What has been done in the last 10 years since Rosie Batty's story went global?
Who wins in the current family law system? I can tell you now, it’s certainly not the children, and it’s not the innocent party in the divorce.
First, what is domestic violence?
Is it really only the extreme physical assaults, near-death experiences, and actual deaths of women and children at the hands of men that define domestic "violence"? These extreme cases are just the tip of the iceberg, often the culmination of a long, drawn-out process of abuse. ABUSE is the key word here.
Abusers don’t usually start with threats or physical violence. Instead, they slowly turn up the heat. It begins with love bombing and promises of eternal love and commitment. Then come the subtle suggestions: "Your hair would look better a different way," or, "Why don’t you wear this instead?" Financial control follows, with promises of saving all the money "we" earn—don’t spend too much, and we’ll retire young—while he spends freely, and you’re left with a limited grocery budget. You’re made to feel stupid for any choice you make, and you mustn’t dare contradict him—he’s always right. This cycle of manipulation isn’t constant; it comes and goes. And even though the abuser never apologises, they’ll tell the victim, "I love you. I’d never hurt you."
This goes on for months or years, with the victim questioning their sanity, walking on eggshells, and even allowing themselves to be raped to avoid days of silent treatment, followed by an explosive episode where the abuser blames them, telling them they’re defective.
Externally, the abuser may be well-liked and respected, possibly hiding behind Christian beliefs or a position of authority. But behind closed doors, they are cruel and toxic to the person they claim to love most.
Abuse is often unrecognised by the victim. This is where the real damage starts—it’s subtle, hidden, and couched in "love," slowly eroding the victim’s sense of self. It’s only when the victim has a moment of clarity—often when their child is threatened—that they realise they’re in danger. By then, their ability to think clearly has been diminished by the abuser’s tactics.
This is the most dangerous stage. When the victim attempts to leave, the abuser’s fear of losing control escalates, and extreme violence can occur. As we saw in the case of Hannah Clarke and her children, the worst can and does happen.
If we could address the root causes of why abusers abuse, we could save many more lives. But we can’t just focus on the violence. The system doesn’t protect victims who take out Domestic Violence Orders (DVOs) - a piece of paper can’t stop someone who is hell-bent on destruction. It’s too late by then. We need to intervene before it reaches the point of violence.
While the known statistics of women and children dying at the hands of violent men are significant, I believe the true numbers are far higher. If we were to include the suicides of women and men driven to the edge by their partner’s abuse, the PTSD experienced by victims and children, and the ongoing legal battles that weaponise children against the other parent, the scope of domestic abuse would be much larger than what we currently acknowledge.
No one wins in this situation, only the system, the lawyers, the psychologists, and the abuser who often moves on to find another unsuspecting victim, while the surviving victim endures ongoing pain and suffering.
The fact that we only hear about the extreme cases, where abuse escalates to its peak, means that many abusers remain undetected. They are charming and quickly move on once they are caught out. The system will never catch them or hold them accountable unless they do something extreme and news worthy. And even then, the hidden abuse they inflict is far more damaging and harder to recover from than any physical violence.
Any policy related to or inquiry into domestic violence must focus on all forms of domestic ABUSE. The abuse that leads to the violence we actually hear about. Addressing only the physical violence is like saying the preceding abuse that leads to the violence isn’t important. While emotional and psychological abuse may not cause immediate physical harm, it’s just as damaging and debilitating - if not worse - for everyone involved.
We need to stop labelling everything as "domestic violence" and start looking holistically at why people abuse, what drives men or women to control, coerce, and destroy their partner to the point of mental or physical harm, and how can we prevent this starting in the first place.
The system is designed to enable abusers, enrich lawyers and psychologists, while the victims suffer endlessly.
$4.7 Billion wont do anything to stop the rising scourge of narcissistic domestic abuse that leads to violence.
It is my firmly held view that each and every supporter of Hamas, whatever their nationality, whatever their background and status in life, has blood on their hands. By definition they represent a security risk to their host country. The odious cohort of same in this country should be identified and categorised as contemptible fellow travellers in murder.
The reporter should have responded to Albo “How do you know I am not a woman?” Or “Isn’t that sexual discrimination?”
On the hostage murders - that response reminds me of the criticism that was levelled against anyone that dared to suggest “all lives matter” in the wake of George Floyd’s death and BLM protests.
I was enjoying my read of today's 'James' , intending to add a Yarra comment until I got to the execution of the hostages. After power outage, my first news of this event was incomplete- I first thought the IDF had found another six 'bodies.'
But what absolute horror! The unspeakable Hamas had actually executed four men and two women on the point of their being rescued. This -right under the world's eyes at the most so-called advanced time in human history.
This news was on top of our very own local horror- the left-to-die babies. Apparently 700 tiny human lives in just a year. Can you imagine the media excitement if 700 people had died in some kind of accident- say a nuclear plant explosion? But not too much media if it's our two leftist and wokest states, eh.
So it's quite possible that some of you won't know that a second bill is being presented (to Fed. Parl.) to prevent this unbelievable situation continuing:
Human Rights ( Children Born Alive Protection) Bill 2022. Contact your fed. rep.
Back to Yarra- the river. And a bit of a much needed laugh. Thanks to current Weekly Times I learned that discussions/secret papers are well under way to recognise rivers as 'living entities' and bestow them, legally, for all time, with 'personhood'. While Albo and Plibersek may be spearheading this somewhat(!) dubious NZ-led concept, Victoria is way ahead; as is usual with inanity. Discussions with traditional landowners had apparently already produced a 'Water is Life' document and a roadmap in 2022, and drafts of legalising our waterways with personhood are now in Vic.Gov somewhere. But councils, voters, tax- and rate-payers and other concerned persons have not been deemed fit to see them. By yet another too-powerful Minister. Dictatorhood?
Lillian, I'm not about to make a moral or cultural statement about the Yarra, b u t... coming from another state which shall remain anonymous, I thought the old Yarra was the river that flowed upside down! Was that a trick of the rainbow serpent to prevent secret men's / women's business being shown to non traditional owners?
Discussions with traditional owners ?They will go for it if theres a quid in it . Personhood ? FFS for a river ? Will it be man ,woman, trans , or one of the other, seventy genders the xyz mob have thought up or just call it a bloody waterway and piss off back under their stupid rock and leave the rest of us humans alone.
I think I have come to the place that I can no longer cope with all the peculiar politics. NO longer does an elected government care to represent the people, but the people are expected to go along with this insanity! How is it that so many are in agreement with these things? I know the answer and it starts with M - yes, money. They are corrupt to the core
The lefty hypocrisy knows no bounds. Domestic violence and Gazans cannot be used by them in the same sentence. Domestic violence is a way of life for them. The likes of hizbut Tahrir are champions of belting the mid wives and yet the left including the Teals stay quiet. I’d ask my teal MP Zoe Daniel her thoughts but she blocked me for asking questions.
The level of outrage against violence against women and children depend on who the perpetrators are. Zoe Daniels wouldn’t want to know because Hamas are not Jewish or White.
Thanks James, so much material to entertain us. I’m surprised they’ve taken the Putin interference route again, essentially after Zuckerberg’s admission. It’s so boring now, I can’t hardly believe they have the stamina to keep saying the same rubbish.
Lots of segregated high schools have merged but the data shows that teenagers do better in single sex schools.
Why does one minister such as Tanya have so much power? Surely there’s that small thing known as consultation. Albo needs to rein her in or at least call the election before she makes any more decisions. Hopefully Dutton and his crew will be able to overturn them???
Nice that President Putin has endorsed Harris so he can continue to do as he pleases.
A war in Gaza and Ukraine, Taliban back in control in Afghanistan with billions of free military equipment and the Suez Canal closed to shipping,plus unlimited debt and 10 million plus illegal immigrants. What a wonderful election record for the Democrats!
I agree , Putin is not scared of the Cackler but has a healthy respect ,if not fear ,for Donald Trump . Of course he would like a gutless weak leader (like we have got )of the US when he could continue as before unhindered .
Plibersek has form and she can go and do the physically impossible and take the Yarra council with her ,anyway she and the rest of this disgusting excuse for a government will be gone come next May ---or sooner .
"Using a press conference on domestic violence to shamelessly virtue signal is not just pathetic" - it’s downright insulting and degrading.
Warning: Rant ahead. Forgive me for launching into this, but I’ve been thinking about it for a long time, and here’s my opportunity to put thought into words.
What will $4.7 billion actually achieve?
What has been done in the last 10 years since Rosie Batty's story went global?
Who wins in the current family law system? I can tell you now, it’s certainly not the children, and it’s not the innocent party in the divorce.
First, what is domestic violence?
Is it really only the extreme physical assaults, near-death experiences, and actual deaths of women and children at the hands of men that define domestic "violence"? These extreme cases are just the tip of the iceberg, often the culmination of a long, drawn-out process of abuse. ABUSE is the key word here.
Abusers don’t usually start with threats or physical violence. Instead, they slowly turn up the heat. It begins with love bombing and promises of eternal love and commitment. Then come the subtle suggestions: "Your hair would look better a different way," or, "Why don’t you wear this instead?" Financial control follows, with promises of saving all the money "we" earn—don’t spend too much, and we’ll retire young—while he spends freely, and you’re left with a limited grocery budget. You’re made to feel stupid for any choice you make, and you mustn’t dare contradict him—he’s always right. This cycle of manipulation isn’t constant; it comes and goes. And even though the abuser never apologises, they’ll tell the victim, "I love you. I’d never hurt you."
This goes on for months or years, with the victim questioning their sanity, walking on eggshells, and even allowing themselves to be raped to avoid days of silent treatment, followed by an explosive episode where the abuser blames them, telling them they’re defective.
Externally, the abuser may be well-liked and respected, possibly hiding behind Christian beliefs or a position of authority. But behind closed doors, they are cruel and toxic to the person they claim to love most.
Abuse is often unrecognised by the victim. This is where the real damage starts—it’s subtle, hidden, and couched in "love," slowly eroding the victim’s sense of self. It’s only when the victim has a moment of clarity—often when their child is threatened—that they realise they’re in danger. By then, their ability to think clearly has been diminished by the abuser’s tactics.
This is the most dangerous stage. When the victim attempts to leave, the abuser’s fear of losing control escalates, and extreme violence can occur. As we saw in the case of Hannah Clarke and her children, the worst can and does happen.
If we could address the root causes of why abusers abuse, we could save many more lives. But we can’t just focus on the violence. The system doesn’t protect victims who take out Domestic Violence Orders (DVOs) - a piece of paper can’t stop someone who is hell-bent on destruction. It’s too late by then. We need to intervene before it reaches the point of violence.
While the known statistics of women and children dying at the hands of violent men are significant, I believe the true numbers are far higher. If we were to include the suicides of women and men driven to the edge by their partner’s abuse, the PTSD experienced by victims and children, and the ongoing legal battles that weaponise children against the other parent, the scope of domestic abuse would be much larger than what we currently acknowledge.
No one wins in this situation, only the system, the lawyers, the psychologists, and the abuser who often moves on to find another unsuspecting victim, while the surviving victim endures ongoing pain and suffering.
The fact that we only hear about the extreme cases, where abuse escalates to its peak, means that many abusers remain undetected. They are charming and quickly move on once they are caught out. The system will never catch them or hold them accountable unless they do something extreme and news worthy. And even then, the hidden abuse they inflict is far more damaging and harder to recover from than any physical violence.
Any policy related to or inquiry into domestic violence must focus on all forms of domestic ABUSE. The abuse that leads to the violence we actually hear about. Addressing only the physical violence is like saying the preceding abuse that leads to the violence isn’t important. While emotional and psychological abuse may not cause immediate physical harm, it’s just as damaging and debilitating - if not worse - for everyone involved.
We need to stop labelling everything as "domestic violence" and start looking holistically at why people abuse, what drives men or women to control, coerce, and destroy their partner to the point of mental or physical harm, and how can we prevent this starting in the first place.
The system is designed to enable abusers, enrich lawyers and psychologists, while the victims suffer endlessly.
$4.7 Billion wont do anything to stop the rising scourge of narcissistic domestic abuse that leads to violence.
It is my firmly held view that each and every supporter of Hamas, whatever their nationality, whatever their background and status in life, has blood on their hands. By definition they represent a security risk to their host country. The odious cohort of same in this country should be identified and categorised as contemptible fellow travellers in murder.
The reporter should have responded to Albo “How do you know I am not a woman?” Or “Isn’t that sexual discrimination?”
On the hostage murders - that response reminds me of the criticism that was levelled against anyone that dared to suggest “all lives matter” in the wake of George Floyd’s death and BLM protests.
Barbarous bastards and the wog wants to bring them here .as refugees .
I was enjoying my read of today's 'James' , intending to add a Yarra comment until I got to the execution of the hostages. After power outage, my first news of this event was incomplete- I first thought the IDF had found another six 'bodies.'
But what absolute horror! The unspeakable Hamas had actually executed four men and two women on the point of their being rescued. This -right under the world's eyes at the most so-called advanced time in human history.
This news was on top of our very own local horror- the left-to-die babies. Apparently 700 tiny human lives in just a year. Can you imagine the media excitement if 700 people had died in some kind of accident- say a nuclear plant explosion? But not too much media if it's our two leftist and wokest states, eh.
So it's quite possible that some of you won't know that a second bill is being presented (to Fed. Parl.) to prevent this unbelievable situation continuing:
Human Rights ( Children Born Alive Protection) Bill 2022. Contact your fed. rep.
Back to Yarra- the river. And a bit of a much needed laugh. Thanks to current Weekly Times I learned that discussions/secret papers are well under way to recognise rivers as 'living entities' and bestow them, legally, for all time, with 'personhood'. While Albo and Plibersek may be spearheading this somewhat(!) dubious NZ-led concept, Victoria is way ahead; as is usual with inanity. Discussions with traditional landowners had apparently already produced a 'Water is Life' document and a roadmap in 2022, and drafts of legalising our waterways with personhood are now in Vic.Gov somewhere. But councils, voters, tax- and rate-payers and other concerned persons have not been deemed fit to see them. By yet another too-powerful Minister. Dictatorhood?
Lillian, I'm not about to make a moral or cultural statement about the Yarra, b u t... coming from another state which shall remain anonymous, I thought the old Yarra was the river that flowed upside down! Was that a trick of the rainbow serpent to prevent secret men's / women's business being shown to non traditional owners?
Too thin to plough and to thick to drink ?
Discussions with traditional owners ?They will go for it if theres a quid in it . Personhood ? FFS for a river ? Will it be man ,woman, trans , or one of the other, seventy genders the xyz mob have thought up or just call it a bloody waterway and piss off back under their stupid rock and leave the rest of us humans alone.
I think I have come to the place that I can no longer cope with all the peculiar politics. NO longer does an elected government care to represent the people, but the people are expected to go along with this insanity! How is it that so many are in agreement with these things? I know the answer and it starts with M - yes, money. They are corrupt to the core
I felt like that when I read the items today.
The lefty hypocrisy knows no bounds. Domestic violence and Gazans cannot be used by them in the same sentence. Domestic violence is a way of life for them. The likes of hizbut Tahrir are champions of belting the mid wives and yet the left including the Teals stay quiet. I’d ask my teal MP Zoe Daniel her thoughts but she blocked me for asking questions.
The level of outrage against violence against women and children depend on who the perpetrators are. Zoe Daniels wouldn’t want to know because Hamas are not Jewish or White.
Spot on
Thanks James, so much material to entertain us. I’m surprised they’ve taken the Putin interference route again, essentially after Zuckerberg’s admission. It’s so boring now, I can’t hardly believe they have the stamina to keep saying the same rubbish.
Lots of segregated high schools have merged but the data shows that teenagers do better in single sex schools.
Why does one minister such as Tanya have so much power? Surely there’s that small thing known as consultation. Albo needs to rein her in or at least call the election before she makes any more decisions. Hopefully Dutton and his crew will be able to overturn them???
Nice that President Putin has endorsed Harris so he can continue to do as he pleases.
A war in Gaza and Ukraine, Taliban back in control in Afghanistan with billions of free military equipment and the Suez Canal closed to shipping,plus unlimited debt and 10 million plus illegal immigrants. What a wonderful election record for the Democrats!
Thanks James. The world is in a mess. Thankfully I know how it all ends and Who ultimately puts things in order!
Keep those Saturday Sanity Checks of yours coming James!!
Have a good weekend 🙏🏽
The nonsense that spews out of the left of the uniparty is mind boggling.
As for the Russia gate attempt in the US- hasn’t Putin endorsed Cackles and Walz?
Yes and he laughed when he did so….hes enjoying comedy
He has endorsed them, because he knows how stupid they are and then he can destroy the USA
I think there’s a bigger picture Diane…he won’t destroy the USA
I agree , Putin is not scared of the Cackler but has a healthy respect ,if not fear ,for Donald Trump . Of course he would like a gutless weak leader (like we have got )of the US when he could continue as before unhindered .
Yarra Council are very aptly named…they’ve gone “yarra” with power!!
Plibersek doesn’t care about the millions of hectares of trees being chopped or animal habitats being destroyed…Environment Minister my arse!!
And The Greens are not for saving the Planet at all….they’re just a political party
Human Rights Activists are the hypocrites of the century
By the way I noticed Greta is just an activist now probably paid to show up for the Press photo…of course wearing a rag around her shoulders
Plibersek has form and she can go and do the physically impossible and take the Yarra council with her ,anyway she and the rest of this disgusting excuse for a government will be gone come next May ---or sooner .
‘We know where the flatulence is coming from, and it's not the cattle’…
Amen to that.