A Narcissistic Woketard Just Drove Jaguar Off a Cliff

Jaguar management threw the car keys to a woke marketing executive who drove the company straight off a cliff.

That’s the only way to explain what has happened to this once great car manufacturer.

The British automotive company, responsible for beautiful motor cars such as this …

has just rebranded with this …

I know what you’re thinking.

Where’s the car?

If you’d told me Jaguar were going to get into Drag racing, this is not what I would have envisaged!

The man behind the advertisement said …

“It's bold. It's fearless. It's exuberant. It's everything a Jaguar should be.”

Yeah, nah. It’s just gay.

The advertisement made me want to sell my Jaguar immediately; and I don’t even own a Jaguar.

Jag used to lure car buyers with ads like this …

But that was back in the days before the great Woke virus took hold of people’s minds and turned them into a bunch of hostile self-satisfied intersectionals striking poses in ugly costumes.

These days, women are not women, and men are most certainly not on the “prowl” in search of beautiful women.

The new Jaguar advertisement features only gender confused weirdos who prefer to prance rather than prowl, and who would probably burst into tears at first sight of an internal combustion engine.

Oh, the emissions!

So what happened to Jaguar, whose slogan used to be ‘Grace, Space and Pace”?

How did they go from selling petrol guzzling cars, to selling Woke tomfoolery?

Meet head of marketing, Santino Pietrosanti, and wonder no more why Jaguar is heading the same way as the Dodo bird …

Santino, who lives in Milton Keynes with his husband Paul and his cockapoo Mia, has decided he will use his position at Jaguar to sell diversity rather than sports sedans.

Speaking at the Attitude Awards last month - while wearing a spangled dinner jacket over a see-through t-shirt - he promised that the rebrand would 'bring Jaguar back to something truly special.'

By which he meant he would hollow out the historic British car company, founded in 1922, to promote his generation’s nihilist worldview.

He gushed …

“We're not just talking about new cars.”

Er, I’ve seen your ad. You’re not talking about cars at all!

“We are talking about all new ways of thinking and embracing the full spectrum of human potential and creativity.”

I just want a v12 engine in a two-door sports sedan that drinks fuel like a drunken sailor on shore leave.

But Santino wasn’t finished …

“And we believe that every person has the potential to be something unique, something original, and that's what makes us strong.”

I’m just after a car. Do you still make them?

And at Jaguar we proudly stand with the LGBTQ+ community because we know that originality and creativity thrives in spaces where people are free to be themselves.”

Cool. So, the latest Jaguar, what’s its top speed?

“We're committed to fostering a diverse inclusive and unified culture that is representative of not only the people who use our products but in a society in which we all live.”

And the car? Is it turbo?

“We believe individuality is our superpower.”

I’m after a two-door sedan and I want it in traditional British racing green.

“We've established over 15 DEI groups such as Pride, women in engineering, and neurodiversity matters.”

On and on Santino went.

He told the Attitude Awards …

“Only two weeks ago we held our second Global annual DEI summit, where we had over 10,000 employees from around the globe attend. And this journey is going to continue for us at Jaguar, and we are going to set the benchmark for our industry.”

I hope those 10,000 employees enjoyed their DEI summit. Because they’re all going to be looking for jobs in a couple of years.

The narcissism is incredible.

Santino clearly believes the world thinks as he does. He’s going to use Jaguar to sell his DEI vision. And all we wanted was a purring sports car.

The problem with Woke ideology in marketing is that its proponents will blame you, the consumer, for not liking what they're forcing on you.

To be clear, they think there's something wrong with you, not the ad.

They're totally committed and will stay on the ride all the way to insolvency.

Woke destroys what great people built before them.

A hundred years from now, marketing students will study Santino Pietrosanti and Jaguar as an example of exactly what not to do.