Iran Denies Breaking Trump's Ceasefire

Iran has denied breaking the ceasefire agreement it very clearly shattered approximately 23 seconds after it was brokered by Donald Trump.

The ceasefire had been hailed by Trump as “the greatest peace deal since Jesus did that loaves and fishes thing”.

But the deal ended faster than a Joe Biden sentence.

Within moments of signing the ceasefire, Iranians were already launching fireworks - sorry, ballistic missiles - into northern Israel in what Tehran insists was “a coincidental celebration of regional harmony.”

Standing in front of a smoking crater in Haifa, Iranian Foreign Minister Mehdi Obfuscati explained the Islamist understanding of a peace deal.

“In Islam, a ceasefire means you cease while we fire, and then you cease completely.”

Pressed on whether the missile strikes violated the agreement signed that morning, Obfuscati replied …

“We never actually read the agreement. In our culture, signing is more of a symbolic gesture.”

Undeterred by the broken ceasefire, Donald Trump took a victory lap around Mar-a-Lago golf course, telling reporters …

“Look, I brokered a beautiful deal. The best deal.

“Iran agreed to stop attacking Israel, and Israel agreed to stop existing - I mean, stop retaliating.

“Everyone wins! Except maybe Israel, but that’s just details folk, just details.”

Asked about Iran’s apparent breach of the agreement, Trump dismissed it as “a minor misunderstanding”.

“The deal was perfect. Beautiful.

“I said to Iran, ‘No boom-boom,’ and they nodded. Tremendous nodding. No one’s ever nodded like that.

Trump said he had no idea why the Iranian missiles were launched …