IF / THEN ... ANDREW EDITION

Feb 19, 2026

∙ Paid

IF …

it was an attractive female police officer, dangling handcuffs, who knocked on Andrew’s door at 8am …

I can imagine the former Prince, known in his early years as ‘Randy Andy’, must have thought to himself, ‘What a birthday present!’

twenty officers were involved in the arrest of the elderly Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor …

for what? The cameras? If only the UK could spare twenty officers for Dover when the inflatable armada arrives daily from France.

To be fair, there was a big house to search, lots of devices to take away, and 72 teddies that could have been concealing evidence!

the arrest of Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor demonstrates anything …